Single Since Birth

A lot of people are wondering why i'm still single at my age.or why i had never had a boyfriend before.some would even reach the point of doubting my sexuality. my sister's housemate, who i used to exchange text messages with, even asked her if i am a lesbian.as if all girls who had never had a boyfriend are lesbians or its our fault that we are single. luckily, i gave up texting him, coz aside from being senseless, i don't like the way he jokes about me a lot, and when its my turn to joke about him, all of a sudden he becomes sensitive and get offended... boys...

I can't say that i'm single by choice.well, maybe i am, because i have a habit of ignoring, to the point of being rude, some boys who i feel are "flirting" with me(well, that's because i don't like them,haha). i have the tendency to steer away from boys(that i don't like) whenever i hear some "talks" about the both of us. this is when i don't like them. but when i like a boy, i stick with him, talk to him a lot, try to know things about him. typical stuff girls do. and it ends there. when i feel that he's starting to feel uneasy, i just stop and let him go. then, life goes back to normal.

once i got a little too close with a guy. honestly, he's not my type, but i went on with our so-called "special friendship" because i'm bored and i need someone to talk to. but it ended up badly, because we got too close for comfort, and it got so complicated i just let him go. he once told me he loves me, but i didn't believe him because he has a girlfriend at that time. them i learned that they broke up right after our "relationship" ended. i want to ask him why he broke up with her,and if he ever loved me, but i realized that whatever his answer will be, it wouldn't change anything. i don't want him back, neither do i want him to be my boyfriend, but i think his answer would have boosted my ego. but i don't have the guts to ask him. and right now, i don't care whatever his answer will be.

i enjoy being single. i can do whatever i want without asking for someone else 's permission. i can go out with almost anybody, without anyone getting jealous or angry. i can play football with the guys, i can stay out late and i can go wherever i want, without worrying that someone out there is wondering where i am, waiting for me to call.

i'm not saying that i want to be single forever. i also want to have someone to build a family with. someone i can grow old with. but i can wait until that someone comes. and when he comes, i know he is worth the wait.

Nostalgia

simula nung isang araw, past time ko na ang magreminisce.lagi ko tinitingnan yung mga friendster account ng mga kaklase ko nung highschool, tas iniisip kung ano na kaya nangyayari sa kanila. pinapansin ko rin kung bakit yung iba nila na kaklase namin, hanggang ngayon hindi ko pa "friend". naalala pa kaya nila ako? hindi naman sa loner ako, pero uso kse ang grupo grupo noon sa skul. tas ako, walang permanenteng grupo...haha..pero lahat sila kasundo ko...or sa pagkakaalam ko, magkakasundo kami...
unti unti na rin nabubuwag ang samahan...
ganito ba talaga pag tumatanda?

Verum Est

Hindi ako makapaniwala na gumagawa ako ngayon ng isang blog.para sa isang tao na kinasusuklaman ang anumang uri ng pagsusulat, matatawag itong achievement. siguro hindi ko naman talagang kinasusuklaman ang pagsusulat, na trauma lamang siguro ako noong highschool dahil sa kalokohang formal at informal themes na pinasusulat ng mga titser sa English at Filipino. isipin mo, pano ka ba naman makakagawa ng isang magandang composition kung ang topic mo ay tungkol sa outerspace?bakit, nakarating na ba ako dun?at siguro din nananadya ang tadhana dahil napadpad ako sa isang kurso kung saan hindi ka mabubuhay kung hindi ka magsusulat.wala naman kasi sa plano ko na pumasok sa kursong ito, pinagkaitan nga lamang ako ng tadhana at ginawa nya akong bobo sa math.haay

masasanay na siguro ako magsulat.simula ngayon.